I waited to write this post until the big ultra sound was completed. My wife is about 22 weeks pregnant with our second child but for some reason I was more nervous about this pregnancy than the last. Lately, I have been inundated by pregnancy and parenthood horror stories about miscarriages, deformities and other problems. We had a realization a couple days ago that both of us went into the first pregnancy relatively naïve about the potential problems we could face and this time around are more cautious about our optimism. While we knew the potential problems, it was something I don't think we internalized very much.
Call it maturity or call it experience, but I am most definitely a different person now then when my wife was pregnant with our daughter. There is a comedian (Michael McIntyre) who has a clip from his comedy spread "People with no Kids Don't Know" that perfectly explains this phenomenon. I had no idea what I was getting into when our daughter was on the way. I obviously don't regret having children but knowing what I know now would have changed my perception during the pregnancy. That change in perspective concerns simple things like appreciating sleep a little more, and driving slower/safer but it also puts a new perspective on the bigger picture like being healthy for my kids so I am there for them, making career decisions based more on security vice a "passion" and appreciating each little hug I get from my daughter.
Last night I felt my son kick for the first time. It was a small movement but I couldn't get over the enormity of the moment. That kick is the most reassuring thing I could ever want because as long as he is kicking that means he is probably healthy and doing well. At this point in my life I don't really want for many things... Just to feel the kick of my unborn son and know my daughter is safe. Everything else is just icing on the cake.
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